Wesley Snipes really doesn’t want to go to prison.

Not that anyone does. But Snipes is going to ridiculous legal lengths to avoid serving a three-year prison term for tax evasion. His first appeal, of the conviction itself, failed. Now he’s challenging the length of the three-year sentence.

Here’s his defense in a nutshell:

• Not paying taxes for five years (when you’re rich no less): Eh.
• Going to jail for three years: So harsh! Lay off, government!

Seriously. The 47-year-old actor’s lawyers are calling the sentence “unreasonable” and claiming that his trial should have taken place in New York, not Florida.

Never mind that Snipes’ records show he lived in both states or that he had ample time to request a venue change in the years-in-the-making trial’s location.

Come on, Wesley Snipes. It’s over, man.

“The right to a correct venue is part and parcel to the right to a jury trial,” Snipes’ attorney, Peter Goldberger, said of Snipes, who is still free on million bond.

The prosecution, meanwhile, shot down Goldberger’s claim, saying that no amount of whining over the justly chosen venue can reverse Snipes’ tax wrongdoing.

“Wesley Snipes received a fair trial and fair sentence,” Asst. U.S. attorney Patricia Barksdale said. “His numerous appeals do not make that sentence erroneous.”

Snipes was sentenced in April of last year after a jury determined that the actor failed to file returns on at least .8 million in income between 1999-2004.

At least his White Men Can’t Jump quotes should be popular in jail.

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A judge has unsealed a search warrant issued against Applied Pharmacy Services in Las Vegas, where authorities believe Dr. Conrad Murray obtained Propofol.

In case you don’t know by now, that’s the powerful anesthesia police believe killed Michael Jackson, and Murray, his personal physician, was administering it.

The affidavit says at the scene of Michael Jackson’s death at his L.A. home, Propofol was recovered “in Dr. Murray’s doctor’s bag and on the bedside table.”

In order to make their case, police are looking to pin down Visa and FedEx information linking Dr. Conrad Murray to the sale of Propofol by Applied Pharmacy.

According to the affidavit, during the search of Dr. Murray’s home and office, police recovered a sales receipt from Applied Pharmacy - dated May 12, 2009.

On that date, Dr. Conrad Murray purchased four vials of Propofol.

Police are trying to tie Dr. Conrad Murray’s conduct to Michael Jackson’s death.

He also bought three vials of benzos, and another drug, flumazenil, which is actually considered an antidote to a benzo, and is used to counteract benzos.

The total cost of the drugs: 3, with a FedEx shipping fee.

After Jackson died June 25, Dr. Murray told police he was not the first doc to introduce Jackson to Propofol. Dr. Murray stated that Dr. Arnold Klein and Dr. Allan Metzger had given Jackson medicine that he says was not working.

And there’s this: “Detectives interviewed Grace Owanda (sic), Jackson’s children’s nanny.” That’s Grace Rwaramba, who is in fact MJ’s children’s nanny.

“Owanda” stated that Michael Jackson was currently being treated by [Dr. Arnold Klein] and the last physician to treat Jackson was Dr. Larry Koplin.”

And we wonder why the investigation is taking forever …

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Britney Spears’ ex-boyfriend, Adnan Ghalib, was sentenced today to 45 days in county jail after he pleaded no contest to leaving the scene of an accident.

During said accident, he hit a process server with his car and took off. The victim was attempting to subpoena Adnan in a Spears restraining order case.

He was told to stay away from Britney until 2012, incidentally. In the hit and run case, at least Adnan Ghalib gets credit for one day already served. Woo!

Ghalib will be placed on formal probation for 36 months, has to complete 52 weeks of anger management classes and 45 days of Caltrans (hard labor).

Adnan Ghalib is finally headed where he belongs.

The celebrity gossip photographer was initially charged with three felonies after the incident: assault with a deadly weapon, battery and hit-and-run.

As part of his plea deal, the first two were dropped.

He still faces outstanding warrants for enabling Britney Spears during her dark period and for dressing like an enormous douche. Just kidding. Kind of.

About the second part. Dude was totally an enabler.

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From all indications, The Twilight Saga: New Moon box office results will be absolutely massive on its opening night this evening (or technically this morning).

Anyone surprised?

Advanced ticket sales for the second part of the series have sold out thousands of theaters, projecting an -100 million opening weekend for the film.

The first Twilight film brought in .6 million its first days.

According to MovieTickets.com, an online seller, New Moon is the #1 Advance Ticket Seller of all time, topping Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith.

Whether you’re on Team Jacob or Team Edward, we know where you’re going to be Friday night: theaters. Sorry, members of Team Volturi. No one likes you guys.

News organizations nationwide reported local theaters selling out, with many camped out for hours to stake out their spot for the heavily-hyped premiere.

Before even hitting the screen, 2,000-plus theaters sold out. Estimates indicate it already raked in .3 million with just its 12:01 a.m. screenings today.

That’s an all-time high for midnight premieres.

When released, the final box office results are expected to be outstanding for the first weekend of its release, despite the mixed reviews it’s drawn so far.

THG will be reviewing the movie after visiting one of those sold-out theaters tonight. Check back early tomorrow morning for our New Moon review!

Have you seen New Moon already? If so, what did you think? Vote below!

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Hard at work writing and shilling for her new memoir, it’s hard to believe that Carrie Prejean makes time for love (well, besides self-love in those nude pics and videos).

But she does. Carrie’s dating NFL scrub star Kyle Boller!

The backup quarterback for the St. Louis Rams and Carrie Prejean have been dating since the summer, according to Radar Online, which broke the story today.

The gossip site also posted this cute photo of the two:

Carrie Prejean has proven to be a very bad liar and role model. Kyle Boller has impeccable credentials as a bad quarterback. It’s a match made in heaven!

“I know she does like him a lot. I’m pretty sure she’s happy,” Prejean’s brother Billy Arnone said, noting that she likes the Chargers, not Boller’s St. Louis Rams.

Good thing, too. The Rams are 1-8 this season. Boller also sucks.

Something about Kyle is doing it for her, though. In her book Still Standing, Carrie wrote the following dedication to her man, whose identity we now know:

“To my Kyle: I am so blessed to have you in my life. You have shown me what love is. Thank you for supporting me through all this drama. I knew when we met there was something so special about you.”

Clearly it wasn’t his 71.5 career passer rating.

No word on how Carrie Prejean and Kyle Boller got together. Maybe his eHarmony profile said he was looking for a SWF with a penchant for homophobia, pleasuring herself on video, throwing hissy fits and stretching the truth.

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